Dear Chuck,

I grew up going to Black Friday sales and always looked forward to the day. I want to save money while my husband wants to ignore it to focus on “quality” time with our children and extended family. What would you do?

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Family Time or Black Friday Shopping

Dear Family Time or Black Friday Shopping,

Certainly, I am for the two of you agreeing and enjoying your Thanksgiving together. Let’s look at the big picture before I give my advice.

Extended sales season

Bain and Company is forecasting U.S. retail sales to hit $75 billion between Black Friday and Cyber Monday. A poll conducted by Croud on LinkedIn found that limited-time offers are the most compelling to Black Friday shoppers. Flexible payment options follow at a distant second.

Black Friday falls on November 29th, which is later than usual this year. Consumers will still have plenty of time for deals because sales are beginning early and lasting beyond Cyber Monday. In fact, sales are forecasted to extend through the entire first week of December. You no longer have to anticipate just two days of major sales. Some deals are only minutes long, while others may last until the inventory is gone.

Inflation pain lingers

With lingering inflation, many Americans are also struggling to make ends meet. If your budget is tight, perhaps your husband is trying to protect you and the entire family. Aim to discuss the topic at a deeper level when the children are not present. Pray together, and prioritize your unity as you discuss the pros and cons. From my perspective, you have plenty of days to shop before Christmas. I propose exchanging the time you would invest to find a good deal for time that cannot be replaced. I would skip Black Friday shopping and joyfully be with your family. What did you enjoy about Black Friday shopping in the past? Was it the companionship of friends or family or the deals themselves? Share your heart. It may be that a compromise with your husband would enable you to do both.

Shopping alternatives

Rest is a tradition many should consider! A Gallup poll reports that stress is rising for Americans and that a majority do not get enough sleep. You may be so conditioned to work, work, work that resting is easier said than done. Let me suggest some alternatives to shopping that your family might enjoy together.

REI is closing its stores on Thursday and Friday and paying 15,000 employees to Opt Outside. They encourage customers to choose nature therapy as opposed to retail therapy. Patagonia’s website states, “Black Friday doesn’t sit well with us. Let’s slow our roll and consider our impact.” Here are a few alternatives we should all consider:

• Embrace Friday as an extension of Thanksgiving Day: eat, be grateful, and enjoy one another.
• Host an annual bonfire with smores and hot chocolate.
• Host a leftover potluck with close friends.
• Decorate for Christmas and listen to Christmas music.
• Decorate a gingerbread house.
• Watch a holiday movie.
• Plan advent devotions/activities.
• Address Christmas cards.
• Make gifts.
• Spend time outside.
• Play board/card games.
• Volunteer somewhere or serve a neighbor.

A few shopping tips

• Pray for guidance and self-discipline.
• Seek unity as a couple regarding your budget.
• Make your list.
• Stick to your budget.
• Start a shopping cart early.
• Compare prices and avoid scams by shopping at legitimate sites.
• Check shipping costs and return policies.
• Control compulsive urges.
• Remember that gifts don’t have to cost money.

Couples should honor one another when deciding how to spend their holidays. Establishing new traditions can breathe fresh air into the relationship. Keep those that strengthen your family as a whole and eliminate those that create stress. Adopt new ones that reflect your priorities.

Holidays are a gift that should be used to deepen your walk with Christ, one another, and those around you. Spending time together and being thankful will be a priceless gift.

“Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you” (1 Thessalonians 5:16–18 ESV).

“In ordinary life, we hardly realize that we receive a great deal more than we give and that it is only with gratitude that life becomes rich” (Dietrich Bonhoeffer)

“When it comes to life the critical thing is whether you take things for granted or take them with gratitude” (G.K. Chesterton).

“The soul that gives thanks can find comfort in everything; the soul that complains can find comfort in nothing” (Hannah Whitall Smith).

“Thanksgiving creates abundance” (Ann Voskamp).

“Every time we decide to be grateful it will be easier to see new things to be grateful for. Gratitude begets gratitude, just as love begets love” (Henri J.M. Nouwen).

I’d like to invite you to join a free Crown Bible study on the YouVersion app. We have several devotionals regarding money and stewardship that will provide encouragement by bringing God’s Word into your daily life.