The balls are too flat. The balls are too solid. The balls are too … new?

Los Angeles Lakers head coach JJ Redick, fresh off his first career coaching victory over the Minnesota Timberwolves on Tuesday night, wasted no time getting his gripes in. 

“I’m going to send in a request for the league [Wednesday] so that we can play with worn-in basketballs [going forward],” Redick said. “I’m being dead serious — I’m not sure why we’re playing in real games with brand new basketballs.”

“You think I’m joking?” Redick, 40, asked. “I’m neurotic.” 

The former player, podcaster and analyst turned head coach’s bad ball digression was immediately preceded by a scrutinization of the Lakers’ 3-point woes.

LeBron James, his son Bronny James, Anthony Davis and Co. went just 5-for-30 on their 3-point attempts but still managed to grab a 110-103 win.

“We got great looks and there were even some 3s in the second half that were wide open,” Redick said. “We just couldn’t knock ‘em down.”

Luckily for Redick and the Lakers, the bungles from behind the arc were neither the headline nor the lede, but instead a footnote in the story of a historic evening: for the first time ever, a father-son duo shared an NBA court.

Still, Redick deemed the ball’s newness worthy of conversation.

It’s worth noting that the Timberwolves shot 31.7 percent from 3, nearly double the Lakers 16.7 mark.

“Anyone who’s ever touched an NBA ball brand new knows it’s a different feel and touch than a worn-in basketball … give the guys the opportunity to pick a good basketball,” Redick said.

In his first appearance with Minnesota, former Knicks star Julius Randle played more than 34 minutes and racked up 16 points, nine rebounds and four assists.

Donte DiVincenzo came off the bench, hit 2-of-8 3-point attempts and finished the contest with 10 points, three assists and two steals.